Heart Fluency is a mindfulness-based, somatic inquiry practice to access and clarify wise, compassionate action from its source – your heart. AskLove’s highly moderated and resourced forum provides a community platform enabling members to support each other, especially in times of conflict or challenge, with the heart-based wisdom they tap via Heart Fluency. Together Heart Fluency and AskLove provide the practice, community, trainings, 24/7 support, evidence and confidence that leading from your heart is the most effective, pragmatic and durable option to meet life’s thorniest issues. Your fullest potential and deepest knowing are engaged as you align and tap your centers of intelligence and power.
Our Challenge – Headiness & Why We Bypass Our Hearts – Knowledge vs Wisdom
“Hatred never ceases by hatred, but by love alone is healed.” These words used by Martin Luther King Jr, Gandhi and Buddha were the inspiration for Heart Fluency and AskLove. When we feel hatred, we sense coldness and contraction. When we feel love, there is warmth and expansion. You cannot relieve a cold contraction with more of the same. This is a law of nature just like gravity. What would our world be like if we recognized and lived this truth at a fundamental level? It would be a paradise. We are in relationship to gravity in every moment. What would it take to be in relationship to this truth in the same way? Einstein said you can not resolve an issue with the same consciousness that created it. How do we change?
First let’s recognize that we are so deeply conditioned to lead with our heads (if we haven’t already reacted from our primal instincts). No surprise given that we’ve been in the Age of Reason for the last few hundred years fueled by industry, science and technology. We’ve been taught in our schools, families and media that if we just try harder and figure in all of the variables, we’ll get the right answer. That’s what wisdom is, we’re told. Indeed our symbol of wisdom is the learned, professorial owl. Be smart and figure it out. If we don’t, it’s our fault. So when that inevitable crazy conflict or challenge comes along, we either react and regret it, or contract and spin in our heads. But spinning in our heads just exhausts us. We’re using a linear tool for a nonlinear issue.
Our reasoning intellect, as amazing and powerful as it is, sees things in pieces and parts. It separates people and things out. This fuels divisiveness and polarization and we end up with Us vs. Them. It is our hearts, however, that fundamentally feel an interconnected whole. And that’s how reality actually is. With issues such as global warming or migration that do not respect borders, we directly feel and see our interdependence. We discover that wisdom isn’t a product of logical reasoning, it’s a result of connection. Wisdom that is not informed by interconnectedness is not wisdom. It’s not in our heads, it’s in our hearts. You wouldn’t call a computer wise. So when we lead from our hearts we tap wisdom itself and get our most realistic, effective, durable responses. We’ve got loads of knowledge and data, and a dirth of wisdom to wield them. The Buddha himself said “May the mind be a servant of the heart.”
Leading with our hearts is the fundamental, foundational orientation from which all of our many forms of personal, communal, societal, and global issues cry out to be addressed. We desperately need to shift from the Age of Reason to an Age of Wisdom to enjoy the world of harmony and mutuality that we know in our bones is possible. But how do we do that in the face of our primal reactivity and deeply conditioned headiness?
Heart Fluency – Tapping Our Hearts’ Wisdom & Aligning our Power Centers
Humans have 4 main centers of intelligence – reasoning (intellect), relational (heart), creative (field), and sensorial (intuition or gut). With its central position, the heart is connected to the other three. Heart Fluency uses mindfulness and somatic, open inquiry to expose our hearts’ wisdom and harness its centrality. There are three steps named Stop, Drop and Open.
We first Stop and recognize that a conflict or challenge has arisen. Next we drop our attention into the heart space and feel the issue directly and non-conceptually through mindfulness of sensations. When we have established a connection to the unmediated aliveness of the issue, we then non-verbally Open for guidance. We keep our attention on the space of the heart like a cat at a mouse’s door and wait for whatever comes forth.
What emerges when we Open may be an image, an intuition, rational thoughts, an emotion, a change in sensation at the heart or a new sensation arising in another area of the body. Notice how rational thoughts, and intuitions are included, and then there are those truly “outside the box” appearances from the field of creativity. The important thing is that by asking our hearts, we are tapping all of our centers of intelligence. In some cases, nothing may appear which signifies that perhaps patience is best for now – circumstances may change and the situation may resolve itself, or the process can be repeated later when conditions have ripened.
Whatever appears, the intellect immediately engages to try and recognize and interpret the guidance. If the intellect finds meaning, relevance and utility, it supports the articulation and expression of the guidance which may call for an external response, patience, internal resourcing or the learning of a lesson. Now the head is supporting the heart, we’ve tapped all of our centers of intelligence, and our full beingness is engaged and aligned. We’ve accessed our deepest knowing and fullest potential.
This is all well and good, but what do we do when we reflexively contract in the face of conflict and lose access to our heart as a source of wisdom. How do we ensure that a latent, subconscious agenda is not coloring what appears to be a sincere query?
AskLove: Heartsourcing = Empowerment
AskLove.org solves the issues of contraction and coloring by providing an online forum where a person can post their difficult issue(s) and then the community members use Heart Fluency or their innate goodness to provide responses grounded in heart-based wisdom.
When we can’t access our own hearts because we are reflexively contracted, AskLove.org plugs us into the communal heart. Crowdsourcing becomes heartsourcing. If we are unsure of the presence of hidden or latent (subconscious) motivations that may color our practice of Heart Fluency, the members of AskLove provide clear reflections that are unclouded by agenda.
A sense of relief arises when we recognize wisdom in a response, and the intellect then relaxes. We stop endlessly spinning and scheming. The intellect sees things in pieces and parts utilizing linear, rational reasoning to “figure out” what to do. Because reality is mostly neither linear nor rational, we exhaust ourselves by using the wrong tool for the task at hand – life. The heart, however, fundamentally feels an interconnected, interdependent whole and wishes for the benefit of all. It opens to all of our centers of intelligence – intuitive, relational, creative and intellectual to manifest a response or message in a non-linear quantum shift that maps to reality and life’s sometimes absurd challenges much more readily. By accessing the heart, especially by employing Heart Fluency, we tap and align all of our centers of intelligence and power to gain insight and move forward from our fullest potential.
When the head relaxes, it gladly takes up the position of supporting the heart’s wisdom. Now we are truly shifting from the head to the heart and creating the personal and communal transformation our world so dearly needs. To further support this shift, members can also share stories on AskLove.org of when love has healed hatred, or rather when open hearted responses have been particularly inspiring, potent and transformative. Together AskLove and Heart Fluency provide a complete ecosystem of personal and global transformation with the practice, trainings, community, 24/7 support, evidence and confidence to empower a new era in which humanity shifts from the head to the heart to meet life’s challenges,
Why Wouldn’t I go to a Friend or Therapist? Please Do & Use Heart Fluency and AskLove Too
Absolutely – utilize all of of your resources in times of challenge. Friends are very supportive, but recognize that they may be attached to your agenda and therefore experience some of the coloring that can cloud an authentic reflection. In addition, friends may find it difficult to give you the truly clear yet loving input that might be hard for you to hear.
Therapists provide necessary resources, clarity and expertise that can be absolutely vital, but a session has to be booked in advance and then paid for. AskLove provides an additional resource that is available 24/7 for free. In addition, sometimes a sense of dependency can develop in client/therapist relationships, where AskLove is empowering you to take direct action not only for yourself, but for others as well. Participating on AskLove develops your own personal, internal healing capacities individually and for our world.